Sunday, December 26, 2010

The Third World

I'm just the perfect example of an externally controlled society, degrading from inside. What I have is a dream, surreal, melancholic, hallucinogenic, undisputed, limerance, or whatever it is. Hence we have created a world of our own, where the destroyed houses give us hope to build new ones, violated laws give us courage to reach infinite pleasure, uncontrolled stride pleases us to embark on a voyage. Life is a pleasure, and that is why we want to live, we will find some way to please ourselves however hard it may seem. Progressive culture has taken my mind into brightness, and I am conditioned to think bright, look bright, sense brightness, however utopic may it seem to dream that. I have created the third alternative, after grazing through the world of dominance and through the other world of vengeance, the third world, the world of peace.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Just now

The blissful son has turned stoic.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

The eyes again

I was spending my time in some little things
I threw them to the sea
In a hidden desire to have them back
I turned around to see
Those eyes again, gleaming with agony
And passive to the inherent spree.

I didn't fall back and caressed those gaze
I stared at the dilated pupil
Manipulated the vengeance and love in them
And returned my gaze at an irresistible will.

See I've turned logical now,
So I am what I should have been
What can be the de facto rockstar?
Aren't you supposed to be keen??

Monday, December 6, 2010


What you do you are to do it intently, the everlasting attachment with the subject makes your identity,of what you are and what you want to become. Temper and temptations always stays at hand to be flushed out, still the psychic pleasure binds you and your mortal self, gleaming with peace. Time changes and we are bound to change ourselves with that, but the vision always remains intact, unscathed. If I call myself lonely then I have to find a subject to justify the feeling, so as to prove this is that and that is this. The vision, after four years of experimentation still is the same,I want to live. People say how life changes with time,me too seem to copy them. What else to do,to follow the reality principle,living a life of a professional.
Coincidentally I came across the word stoicism, it says ability to endure pain and hardships without any complain. One of my friend arka has succeeded in being such, I wish to be the same. That's what the creative people should be. Pain is just the experience in assimilating the mortal self with the unconscious and in doing so, we are going against Newtonian Forces. So running one mile a day causes pain in the thigh, but enduring it leaves us with a fruitful day.
Daydreaming is bad as I've been told, so I call off Aristotle and Socrates and Plato and Copernicus and Hippocrates in me.Their job is over.I call my mortal self again, back in me.

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Perceptions [1]

The wrath creates a burden
Leaving a sullen face of vengeance
Despite the willingness to unite
The hand grenade gets its freelance.

The heart still beats
With a fear of being stabbed
And people still exist
Paying tax to the vindictive lord.

Faith still crave
For the dream like state
But what we get
Is just a moral obstinate.

The decisions are made
You are to die
But how you live defines
What you leave for others to ply.

How the mortal existence
Gets a little high
Maybe with or without
The bulge of the blue sky.

The cold chuckle

There lies the dreadful misery of the poor Jew in front of the vicious racist. The smile turned into the coldness of tyranny and numbness of death. They want him to die for them. His life has no value as such, he can not be a part of the Reich,he has to give his blood to account for his sin,sin to be born as a Jew. Thereafter he is put into the forced labor camp,to build tanks and guns for the army. This is how a civilization is grown, at the expense of lives. The thriving soldiers of the poor country often despise their onetime masters, complaining about their lives,about how they have been forgotten,how they fought bravely for the queen. They are the birds of the same feather. They are like chewing gum that are to be thrown after their use is over. How can they be remembered? They were supposed to be dead by now,but they are still living,is that a reason for their complain? These people don't understand the fact that they are slaves, they cannot be respected. They cannot be given privileges that they are craving for, they deserve a life meant to perish sooner or later in the service of the victorious (read vicious) racists. Disobeying them will be another call for a lash. The wild beast of racism lies hidden inside the cold chuckle of fraternity. This is how we define humanity.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

The common man

You are a no one, you are coming from nowhere and you have nowhere to go, you are another perfect imperfection in this world- these were the words he used to say to him every single day of his failure. Now it has become a habit to talk anonymously. Failure isn't an option for Mr.sceptical however maimed might be the resources, however crippled might be hearts of the competitors 'one has to win'. And there the virtually sterilized human being raised upto the level of the 13 storey roof manipulates the keyboard to prepare the draft of his resignation. After a few hours he will be free, free like a bird. A doubt still fills up the belly and stresses the pectoral muscles, he will be a common man from today. He won't be praised for being the great son of some humble father, he won't be given a least bit of attention without the company tag. The romantic eyes of some blue moon night will seem drenched in the coldness of refusal, this is life, things turn over so quickly and suddenly in the blink of an eye. Mr.sceptical is again ruminating his past life, he is a software professional now,he can't let the soft emotional bluffs regulate his hard earned job. The draft is still not saved, the cross on the right top can bring an end to it. Proposal of freedom then will be the same melancholia of happiness, life will be the same monotonous mist of pleasure. He keeps wandering and limerating of the achieved and not achieved, the boeing flight wandering through the skies of salt lake waiting for the runway to clear up.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Under the clear blue sky

Goodbye blue sky.... the miracles might not seem to be lost after a prolong celebration of light. Those obnoxious coincidences are still stealing my dreams. Saw the film Inception, maybe that can be an explanation to the state of this vulnerability,that I'm enjoying. No more inhibitions,no destructive things affecting(read incepting) the mind,a perfect state of mass energy equivalence,standing midway on a floating bridge. Is this what I wanted? Or is this what I was destined to become? I don't find any other explanation, just copy paste the word "comfortably numb"

Tuesday, October 19, 2010


I'm sorry my life,for you truly
I have given you nothing such special
Please pardon me for my not being
A gentleman to you and you only.

I could be someone special,if I could
I would have comforted you to my best
I could have shown you what I think of you
But hope I could have known it how.

There is nothing left to deny that
You have forgotten me
And me too is likely to burn you out
Through the last smoke,from the heart.

I'm sorry I couldn't be the bird of your eyes
I became the possession of the wild
How can I opt for your cage my love?
I'm not the bird of your might.

I could become your soul-mate
Who carries the sentiments straight from your head
Who promises to remain by your side forever
And serve you like a true servant.

I apologize for not being your man
But don't you dream of having this true
I've known what love is to you
And believe me,I don't love you.

Friday, August 13, 2010

I saw you again

You were just passing through the crowd
Helping yourself all over from the start
Your eyes pitch black bordered
You look like one of the living dead
Wasting and waiting for years in silent rage
"You are so changed
You are so changed".
Who knows what dream you have in your mind?
What are you going to do with your might,
What surprise is waiting for us
That some stupid girl will turn down the glass
And wine will not be there sparkling her skies
She will be the under the thousand stars
Showing her witchcraft,juggling her kohl-lined eyes.
Just waiting to witness
The unseen coincidence

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Wish You Were Here

Bob Dylan said it right "Answer is blowin in the wind".And look at those dreadful eyes shouting for justice.Struggle for existence had taken away their loved ones in a accident like event.India had not experienced any chemical disaster as such and this one epitomized all of its kind,the Bhopal Gas Tragedy - Hiroshima of chemical disaster with a 15000+ dead and 20000 permanently maimed. No no it was just a coincidence, the wind was blowing in the wrong direction,the factory workers were relaxing for a moment,the antidotes to gas intoxication were not known,no kind of SOS information could be sent.Though the company was running machines from the times of British raj,all the forecasts about a chemical mishaps were just some instants of juvenile thoughts.Money being always the only concern and that too with the forsaken lives of a town. Judiciary system of India always had sympathy for the condemned, and they were released with a compensation of 50000 rupees.Question comes are we safe under the administration that is ready to compromise our lives for just some money? So what is the kind of security we are having from our government? This can be the story of any of the city and we really have nothing to do than dying in the name of lord. I just wish you were, to sing aloud with me "And how many miles must a man walk down"

Wednesday, August 4, 2010


A friend of mine once told me that love is nothing but an attractive force that exists between two organisms. I am indulged in theoretical discussion of these forces that are similar to the forces commonly known in the physical world. Comparing the types of love with the types of natural forces I came to the conclusion love can be of three types
Gravitational love,
Magnetic love and

Electric love.
Before any complication arises between the readers I would like to clear them all what are the different types of loves that psychiatrists define

We come to Agape first. Agape is the love for an object for a person for an animal or anything that exists in this world. This is sometimes called Christian Love, but being impartial I know this fact every religion teaches us to have Agape for the world. Now compare it with gravitation. What theory says is that gravitation is the attractive force that exists between two bodies having certain mass kept at a certain distance. It is dependent upon the magnitude of the mass and the gravitational field strength of the masses along a straight line.
Next we come to Storge, it is the love that exists in the form of affection. T
he love of parents, classmates and persons married for 10 years! This can be called friendship, kinship, affection or just emotional support with negligible erotic passions. It is a combined effect of gravitation and magnetism.
Eros gives a different concept of love. It is sometimes called Hollywood love. The amount of passion and ecstasy that is associated with it gives this name. Eros can be compared with magnetic attraction that exists between two magnets. Eros can be sometimes repulsive and non-responsive. It is a fact that romance is short lived. Magnets have two poles North and South, so as Eros love can be very enjoyable and entertaining at times, people in Eros love feels thems
elves attracted to the loved ones, but this can happen that similar poles are faced to two persons and then the egocentric clash and feeling of getting repelled by the onetime romantic partners can be experienced. That is why many love birds are ultimately broken apart and never got united due to their egocentric barriers, but as the law says if the poles are faced in opposite direction only then attraction is possible. That is why scientist says to the broken hearts “change your poles [attitudes]”.
Examples of Mania love can be obtained in the film “Taxi Driver”. It is a strongly passionate and erotic love that is sometimes like a roller coaster ride with emotions. Mania love is sometimes dangerous because of strong emotional impulse that drives a person crazy. Mania can be accounted for a magnetic substance being consistently attracted to a magnet, the former being the victim of the magnetic force. Film actors, cricket players, sometimes beautiful women create this magnetic field of attraction [mania] that their fans suffer from.

Ludus love is game playing love. It is a game of pursuits and conquests. It is accompanied by lack of any commitment rather it is mostly physical attraction oriented. It can be compared to electromagnetic force. This force is dependent upon the combined magnitude of charge and the magnetic field strength of the two matters involved. It can be attractive or repulsive in nature, so as Ludus love can be attractive or repulsive depending upon the external attractiveness and personal achievements of the individuals involved.
Next come to Pragma, it is the rational love that is entirely dependent upon materialistic gains, means a person is attracted to another person preferably due to his or her fame, degree, money, family background and other practical achievements. Example: The film “Pretty Woman”. This is more rational love than emotional love and it is the kind of love we feel for the politicians [no pun intended], rockstars, filmstars, cricket players etc etc. This is purely static electricity, Coulomb’s Law define them. The electrostatic attraction is always dependent on the charge content of the materials involved and it can be severely repulsive if the charge type is similar, that is why two filmstars can never remain happily together for long. A slight difference in mentality is preferable in Pragma love.

We make a comparative study of the love types in a linear scale that is defined with magnitudes of forces

Sunday, July 4, 2010

This side story

Story of ordinary boy with a weak physique compelling him to indulge in lucid dreams.He kept on dreaming and hoping that oneday he will be introduced to his fate,his love.Searches desperately for his love,and fails all the time.His despair is aggravated,he falls into temptations.He intends to love someone and puts himself into a mind of getting her love.But her love was not for him,for someone else maybe.But when wishes turns into despair then obsessions takes place of love.So a maniac lover is born who knows his fate was going to be changed,still desperately trying to be the bird of someones' eyes which had some other dreams.God grace he met someone very like him,having passions as same as his.And see how he blushes and smiles at his friends' mocks.He is attracted to her and she too,he talks with her and she too,he listens to her and she too.They fell in love,their body shivered with lust and pain,mind enticed with love and limerence and they found their lost loves in themselves.The dream continued some seven days and then someday the boy got frightened with himself,he got frightened to dream because he knew he was incapable of turning dreams into reality.He was impractical,a dreamer,a weak person having no fixed goals,no persevearance,no commitments to life,and he restricted his dreams.His love was suppressed she didn't even got a single bit of hint of what had happened,she just intended to make him happy,to talk with him.But no nothing happened,just another failure for the girl and the boy.And this time the boy chose to fail.She didn't lose her hope.Waited for the happy days,dreamt of the good days that were not going to come.Still asking what had happened to you,why are you so sad?Have I done anything?Why are you so down? The chapter ended there commencing the eternal journey of life of the two restless souls.They might not meet each other like before,they might forget the cause of their limerences,the only satisfaction is that they are heading towards the same destiny,towards the same freedom they cherish in their dreams.This is the story of the rockstar and the philosopher.

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Desert of solitude

Her throat had swollen in deep despair
Her hair uncombed and float in air
Her eyes sulky,red with tear
Her lips concealing her inmost desire
Her feelings subsided in the desert of solitude.
She is a rockstar now called for the show
She has to make her happy and let it go
She has to show what is to be seen
She hides her tears with vanishing cream but
She can't close her eyes to hide that desert,the desert of solitude.

Thursday, June 3, 2010


So everything was over by now
I am trying hard to be patient
Getting addicted to stay in solitude
And never again bring you in my head.
Putting the child in me to sleep
Making every move after manipulation
Taking time as the only truth
And never again falling into false emotion.
No kind of impatience is visible outside
Just another workaholic
Nothing bare left to be seen wounded
No observations of being psychic.

Friday, April 30, 2010

Lost in desire

I just wished someone to be beside me and that wish became a desire and that desire became lust.I lost my control,lost my senses,lost my patience and got drowned in pain and despair.My independence got compromised,fate got channelized to some utopian achievements,henceforth I fell in LOVE.

Friday, April 9, 2010


Just realized my mistake and pretended to pass by
Eyes thirsty,needs some glance of your eye
Just then the rickshaw paved its way
My senses trembled with a blissful sway
Felt the urge to follow your lips;I turned to you.
Yes my wish was granted,it was you
Your lips,I could see now,your eyes too
Intending the unspoken desire to touch you
I forced myself to speak
The tar soaked on your injured legs
Was just a cause of the coincidence
Hope you get well soon and
pay them back in their coins
How will this happen again ,dear?
That I'll get my sunshine in those eyes?
That I'll be talking to you some sense
That I'll hold your hand after several tries
Leave it on the coincidence,rockstar
We'll meet again.

Friday, February 26, 2010

I got out for a walk in your place
I was in need of a coincidence
I wanted to see you.
Gliding through the traffic I took a test of my luck
Eventual misfortune just held you back
No coincidence was waiting for me
I didn't waste time in this love frenzy
Took courage to enter your apartment
Determined to see your nameplate
The watchman intervened,eyes in challenge
Had to retreat from this eccentric rage
Some years later or past
A boy came running to hold your grasp
To find his sunshine in your eyes
And psychedelic orgasm in your lips
Was it you smiling in the shower?
Drenched in the pour of the first summer?
Was it you rockstar?
My friend
College life started with a gush of new emotions,new books and most important of all new friends.Some were easy some were hard, some were sporting some were nerd.With the gift of the Gab I could sense them and tried to befriend them all. Here were some kind of funny girl who came to be my friend, I thought her to be somewhat interesting. In course of time I could realize she was the only girl trying to make random friends like me.Still this ‘cheshta’ is more sincere than anyone could expect.This became an advantage to us, born miscreants of the class .Involving her name in romance with almost all the boys and later girls we tried hard to embarrass her .God knows why she does not get angry but whew we go at least someone cool to bully .Spending one and a half years with her was nothing special though she remained the coolest and most sporting girl of the section. Unfortunately she got no support from the ladies compartment .All of the rest found her straight forward ,rough and nonchalant-not satisfying the criteria of being a girl .She had no commitments at all ,she doesn’t look so great ,only the thing she posses is a great heart that is irrespective of all formalities and complications of city life. We thought it might be due to where she came from ,shantiniketan. Nevertheless she mixed with everyone with the same spirit. She came out to be supporting too ,anyone got a heartbreak go and have a talk to her ,share your grief without hesitation ;if you need someone to share the joy of falling in love with someone she is there for you ;need to approach the class teacher for a holiday or be it the lab manuals to be photocopied soon- all credits to one girl .Today we were having some intellectual discussions and the topic was photography .She again started to comment on that and we again felt the urge to pull her leg .She spoke of her father who had some kind of studio which is still her place of astonishment and nostalgia ;Some of us had to ask why nostalgia and she detonated the bomb ,she lost her father at the age of five .She didn’t want to tell us because she found it indifferent to be a friend out of sympathy .A long pause continued until she spoke “Its okay ,don’t be so sorry.”
I still couldn’t comprehend why is she so different but came to another realization that love comes to us only when we are at loss of it . Proud to be your friend my dear alien.

Friday, January 1, 2010

I wish I could have been your friend as before,now that we are no more friends.Its neither ur nor my reason that caused this,its the way we think and we believe that defines ourselves maybe your beliefs and mine had changed as we see life in different perspectives.....
don't be sad dear it was not your fault that you misunderstood me rather it was our beliefs that be-fooled us.
I hoped for a proper friendship having all the blends of life making us feel enchanted,up headed with pride of being friends,unfortunate enough this hope got drowned in the cloud of arrogance as many others were

this is me,an unmindful boy.Being in two minds its hard for me to stay where I have to be.I have my own world with a substantial coexistence in my mind,redefining every aspect in my own words for this undiscovered world.Might be some frenzy to keep this things but they give me a lot of pleasure to move on.These are my progeny,my own world.Wikipedia called it limerence and medical science defines it as a cognitive repetitive syndrome and I call it my reason to stay as I am.